Was sitting in front of the computer, looking at the monitor. So early in the morning, so quiet outside... and I thought of two friends from the past... a brother-n-sister pair, long out of touch. They belonged to a time when I needed nonjudgemental company, company to soothe and yet poke fun at my straitjacket conventionality. I was in turmoil then, under pressure to conform and yet desperately rebelling. But all around me were the trappings of demanding society; my job, my family, my relatives... The nonstop mantra was 'Conform Conform Conform..' My only escape was the night. But even then I only really let myself go when I was with them. And even then... not really. Control was such an issue with me. And they were so much younger than I was. And as I was about to fly off away from my 'cage', Defere came into my life. And so I traded my potential freedom for a different sort of freedom within a cage I wanted. That cage, this cage I am in now, put me squarely...
