Skip to main content

Drive-Through ATM ....

A word of warning : The following is utterly sexist but because it made me laugh, I just had to put it into my blog.

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."


*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.


*******************************


FEMALE PROCEDURE: (Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth!!!!)
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Royal Commonwealth Essay Competition 2009

Another great opportunity for our young people to show what they can do! The Royal Commonwealth Essay Competition has four different age bands, 'Classes'. Each Class offers five topics, plus the Commonwealth Question and the Charlton Athletic Community Trust Question. As we hope to reach a diverse student body across the Commonwealth, there are options for both academic and creative minds.  The Competition deadline is 1st March 2009   CLASS A - Born 1990-1992  1400-1750 words  All questions can be answered by writing an essay or a story which explores the topic in an interesting and relevant way.   Can I help you?  Bullying is an issue which concerns young people throughout the Commonwealth. Why does it matter and what can be done about it?   It is 200 years since Charles Darwin was born and 150 years since the publication of "On the origin of Species". In your view, what evolutionary developments are neede...

Friends That Last The Mile

I have friends who have been with me from schooldays or campus days.... we've been through happy times, stressful moments... even anger and long silences. But when I think of them, I feel a warmth deep inside my heart for they have lasted the mile.  After all these years, they still want to be my friends :)  I told a friend once that when you put your trust in a friend, you are giving that person a knife, which he can choose to put away and never use.  Or stab you in the back.  But I didn't tell that friend that it is possible to survive stabs in the back and still remain friends with the other.  It takes time for the wound to stop bleeding and the heart to forgive, but it is possible. --------------------- There's X, who shared many adventures with me, even though there were points of friction between the two of us.  But I would like to think that deep inside, both of us see beyond those points of conflict.  I appreciate her for being willing to share many enterprises ...

How Challenging Teaching In Sabah Can Be

As a teacher, I have had many memorable experiences but one of the most fascinating has got to be observing my colleagues from other states as they deal with their first days in Sabah. Born and bred in Sabah, I never really had much reason or opportunity to question what sort of image Sabah presented to the outside world (which includes other states in Malaysia) until I went to university in Kuala Lumpur.  And, of course, when I began working as a teacher. My first inkling of how 'scary' Sabah can be to outsiders came during my third year in university.  I had coursemates who quickly got married ... it was the first time I had ever heard of 'nikah gantung'.  Apparently, they could get married but it was a sort of 'marriage on hold' (if such a thing exists..).  What mattered was that they could get a marriage certificate that would help 'save' them from the jungles of Sabah and Sarawak.  Then, during the briefing I attended to receive my first posti...